Madison Ave

I cant focus on this history assignment. ughhh. i need to work on this or else im going to have to do it all in one night and i wont get it done and ill be miserable and ugh. Its Thanksgiving break! I dont want to have to think/worry about it. I just want to see my friends/cousins that I havent seen in forever and do nothing else. Too bad theres so much to be done.

But for right now, its nap time.

and next thing I know im getting out my debit card to buy clothes online.

HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN?

but its only because i havent tumbled in a while. TwoThree other things:

1- The Beatles songs are now on itunes!

2-I got bored one day and printed out a lot of my liked pictures on here and put them on my bulletin board.. hahah no life.

3-Why is tumblr underlined on spellchecker?

How much I cant wait to see emlay on Friday when i go visit her at BU! Shes like 2 feet away from me and it took me 3 months to finally go visit her! ah cant wait :)

and everytime i would post it would say that tumblr was over-populated blah blah and then my post wouldnt go through- who knows if this ones even going to get posted or if im just writing this for my self. we’ll just have to wait and see.. 

So this past week was very stressful, and to be honest im surprised i havent completely lost my mind yet, or maybe i have and i just dont know it. Im just going crazy with the amount of school work that needs to be done in a couple weeks. 26 days until the end of classes and only 16 school days left is not a lot of time and that stupid history assignment really put me over the edge. But its one of those things that will feel so good once its done. Also, I was so set on going to see Harry Potter Thursday night but I have a psych test on Friday and I really cant risk doing bad on it :/ Harry Potter will have to wait :( im sooooo excited to see it- i even got a deathly hallows shirt the other day!

This weekend was good- Hannah, Moses and I had a wine, cheese and sushi night. It was very relaxing and fun. I havent spent time with Hannah outside of work in such a long time so it was nice hanging out for once. Then Sunday night I went to Gages and got too drunk. And of course, the drama found me and suffocated me like always.

I finally set up the fountain i bought for my room lol. Thats kinda cool i guess.. I wish my room wasnt so gross though because I cant focus in this environment. Everything needs to find a place and stay there. THe thunder was SO loud last night. I thought we were getting bombed. The lights at BCC went off again today- right as I was about to get my sub too. typical. But it only lasted an hour-during my break of course. So I went to my grandparents hung out with them for a little then went back to school. I dont really have much else to say, other than if you’re reading this right now Im super excited to see your beautiful face over thanksgiving break :) Endicott wont feel so empty anymore once all my lovely babies are back in town!

I missed my history class this morning because I slept through my alarm. That was my very first college class that I missed and Im so upset that I missed it. Not because we were doing anything important, because we werent, but just because Im extremely mad at myself for sleeping through my ihome, 10 phone alarms and 3 calender appointments. I do remember hearing them go off but they were associated in with my dream so I clearly wasnt aware that they werent supposed to be there and that their intended purpose was to wake me up.

Oh, and I missed transfer day which I am very upset about because I really wanted to go and now I have to make up some reason to tell my parents why I didnt go.

The only thing I did today was start my history paper, shop for rain boots and make a list of things I need to get done by Monday.

I hope tomorrow I have a very productive day because I really cant handle feeling like I did nothing with my life today. Im trying to think of it as just having a “lazy day” but I really just feel like a waste of life right now.

hot apple cider, psych extra credit, jack johnson, shower and chelsea!

Ive been doing a lot of free writes on livejournal lately about life. Its very hard typing sentences that make sense about how I’m feeling. There are so many things that I feel every hour of everyday i think that its all just a combination of confusion. I have so many mixed emotions about school, people and just life in general. I think my indecisiveness has gotten worse over the past couple months because I feel like I can never make up my mind about anything.

School is good. I’m very happy with how my classes are going, I’m doing very well in all of them and Ive really been working my butt off this year. I think the one positive thing about not really doing anything is that I have soo much time for homework and studying. Even psych which i thought i was going to do horrible in since my teacher has the worst rep ever, im doing pretty well in. I have made a few new friends that I pretty much do everything with during the school day.

Work has been going great so far. I already have had so many hours and I really like MOST of the people I work with.

I did talk to Nick Rando the other day on the phone which always brightens my day! He makes me so happy and hes always so positive about everything.  He really been helping me a lot with trying to decide what I should do about studying abroad. I miss that kid a ton <3

Its defiantly been hard these past couple months I feel like Ive been just as depressed as i have been happy, which is weird because im usually never like that. There’s just been so much change, and like Ive said, its not just bad change but the good change has just been a little bit overwhelming. I think Ive been more concerned about how short life really is because i feel like it was just yesterday i was in 5th grade with not a care in the world. Although, i do love the age that Im at now its just sad to think that everyone just keeps getting older, not just me but my grandparents and parents too. Also, Its really been hard not having Alison around everyday like shes been the past 7 years but it just makes me 10x more excited for winter break when we can chill at her house with peanut and eat cwd, cookies and whatever else we please and watch episodes of family feud!